I peer reviewed Emily Bond's video here
I made a resource recommendation and gave her a link to a youtube video that I found that helped me figure out how to work iMovie. Overall her video was very good and I liked how complete it was. The only suggestion I had was to make the music more quiet because sometimes it drowned out what she was saying. I think my recommendation will help with this.
I did not really use any class material for this suggestion.
I liked how her video seems almost complete and am trying to finish mine too.
Wednesday, May 4, 2016
Editorial Report 15b
Audience Questions
How did the content change? How is this better?
This is the same thing as last post. However instead of expanding on the Virginia essay I will be expanding on the QRG example that helped my QRG. This will make it easier for people to understand how peer editing helped me build a stronger project.
How did the form change? How is this better?
Like in the previous post the form is still the same except there is now audio behind the visuals. This is better because audio keeps the audience listening.
Original Text
Re-edited Text
How did the content change? How is this better?
This is the same thing as last post. However instead of expanding on the Virginia essay I will be expanding on the QRG example that helped my QRG. This will make it easier for people to understand how peer editing helped me build a stronger project.
How did the form change? How is this better?
Like in the previous post the form is still the same except there is now audio behind the visuals. This is better because audio keeps the audience listening.
Original Text
Now what helped me a lot when I was stressed out on a
project is peer review. I can confidently say without peer review all of my
projects would have ended terribly. What helped most about peer reviewing is
when I looked at someone else’s project and saw things that I liked that I
could incorporate in my own project. Yea, the peer review comments I received usually
gave me good suggestions; but it was much more helpful seeing someone else’s
project and how they chose to incorporate their ideas. Quite a few times I copied styles/ideas/form
that I liked from my peer’s project and put it into my own.
(Show QRG example and explain)
Re-edited Text
Now what helped me a lot when I was stressed out on a
project is peer review. I can confidently say without peer review all of my
projects would have ended terribly. What helped most about peer reviewing is
when I looked at someone else’s project and saw things that I liked that I
could incorporate in my own project. Yea, the peer review comments I received usually
gave me good suggestions; but it was much more helpful seeing someone else’s
project and how they chose to incorporate their ideas. Quite a few times I copied styles/ideas/form
that I liked from my peer’s project and put it into my own.
What I would often do is go to course directory, select a section, and then look for peers that are doing the same genre I am or have done the genre I am doing. So, in this case, I saw that Emily Bond did a QRG and when I looked at hers I noticed that she decided to bold important words and sentences. This reminded me that a QRG should be as visually appealing as possible and also direct your reader to important information quickly. So I then decided to bold important words and sentences in mine.
Editorial Report 15a
Audience Questions
How did the content change? How is this better?
I expanded on what I am planning on talking about while the screen shows my college essay. This will make it easier for the audience to understand why I chose to incorporate a previous essay in my video.
How did the form change? How is this better?
The form is still the same except there is now audio behind the visuals.
Original Selection
Re-edited Selection
If you look at this essay I wrote when I was applying to the University of Virginia, you can see how I struggled to type anything outside of a standard essay. This prompt was asking me to explain something that has surprised or challenged me in 250 words or less. Instead of talking just about me, I decided to use half of my word limit talking about research that had been done. Although it technically fits the prompt, if I had done an analysis of my audience (something English 109H taught me) I would have realized that I should have spent more time talking about myself and not some other person because college administrators are more interested in me. This would have fit the "rhetorical situation" much better and probably would have been a stronger essay.
How did the content change? How is this better?
I expanded on what I am planning on talking about while the screen shows my college essay. This will make it easier for the audience to understand why I chose to incorporate a previous essay in my video.
How did the form change? How is this better?
The form is still the same except there is now audio behind the visuals.
Original Selection
In high school, the only thing I knew was the standard essay.
No matter what I was typing for it would all come out in the same general
format of an essay. If you asked me to write a eulogy in high school I probably
would have written an essay with sources and citations in MLA format and been
perfectly content.
(Show Essay for University of Virginia and explain)
In high school, the only thing I knew was the standard essay.
No matter what I was typing for it would all come out in the same general
format of an essay. If you asked me to write a eulogy in high school I probably
would have written an essay with sources and citations in MLA format and been
perfectly content.
If you look at this essay I wrote when I was applying to the University of Virginia, you can see how I struggled to type anything outside of a standard essay. This prompt was asking me to explain something that has surprised or challenged me in 250 words or less. Instead of talking just about me, I decided to use half of my word limit talking about research that had been done. Although it technically fits the prompt, if I had done an analysis of my audience (something English 109H taught me) I would have realized that I should have spent more time talking about myself and not some other person because college administrators are more interested in me. This would have fit the "rhetorical situation" much better and probably would have been a stronger essay.
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