How did the content change? How is this better?
I expanded on what I am planning on talking about while the screen shows my college essay. This will make it easier for the audience to understand why I chose to incorporate a previous essay in my video.
How did the form change? How is this better?
The form is still the same except there is now audio behind the visuals.
Original Selection
In high school, the only thing I knew was the standard essay.
No matter what I was typing for it would all come out in the same general
format of an essay. If you asked me to write a eulogy in high school I probably
would have written an essay with sources and citations in MLA format and been
perfectly content.
(Show Essay for University of Virginia and explain)
In high school, the only thing I knew was the standard essay.
No matter what I was typing for it would all come out in the same general
format of an essay. If you asked me to write a eulogy in high school I probably
would have written an essay with sources and citations in MLA format and been
perfectly content.
If you look at this essay I wrote when I was applying to the University of Virginia, you can see how I struggled to type anything outside of a standard essay. This prompt was asking me to explain something that has surprised or challenged me in 250 words or less. Instead of talking just about me, I decided to use half of my word limit talking about research that had been done. Although it technically fits the prompt, if I had done an analysis of my audience (something English 109H taught me) I would have realized that I should have spent more time talking about myself and not some other person because college administrators are more interested in me. This would have fit the "rhetorical situation" much better and probably would have been a stronger essay.
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